Infertility Etiquette

It's National Infertility Awareness Week. Once I decided to be open about our infertility, it opened up a lot of doors that I wasn't sure I was ready to open at the time. Some days, I still don't know if it was the right decision. But, at the time I was struggling with the heartache and loneliness of infertility and I was tired of answering questions about when we would try to start a family. I know that a lot of people don't understand why infertility is such a struggle. For those people I would just say, try to put yourself in my place and see how you would feel if you could not have one of the most precious things you ever desired on this earth. Even harder for us is the fact that we have "unexplained infertility". Which means despite all the testing we have done for both of us, there is no smoking gun telling us what is wrong. By all accounts I should be able to get pregnant just as normally as everyone else. That leaves me to wondering about a lot of things. I end up thinking about it too much and then I end up an emotional wreck! So my solution has been to downplay how hard this is for us, especially me. I feel like if I don't talk about it too much or try not to show too much hope or excitement that the next test will be positive, I won't feel so emotionally beat up.

I have so many friends and family who are praying for us and have been such a wonderful support system and we thank you for that. But, by the same token we have also had so many things said that were meant to be helpful, but really aren't. Their hearts are in the right place, but people may not realize how difficult a road infertility is and say things that really hurt.

I read this article about infertility etiquette and may have even posted it on here before, but wanted to post it again so that as you come in contact with friends and family who are dealing with infertility you will have a better understanding about things you probably shouldn't say to them.